tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-60934242011-04-21T17:30:31.042-07:00Infuential Writings, Non- Commital Rants...The story of a teenage girl living her life and writing it down...Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.comBlogger2221100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1096680366799624432004-10-01T18:12:00.000-07:002004-10-01T18:26:06.800-07:00Trust is something I can't find
Feels like the blind leading the blind
When darkness falls onto your light
Let me be your dynamite
Crash Crash into me
Hit me hard and brutally
I love the pain the hurt the sorrow
I crave it till there's not tommorow
Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1096416187201522602004-09-28T16:38:00.000-07:002004-09-28T17:03:07.203-07:00If anger could be consumed
I swear I'd have had my share
If I could play a game with death
I'd laugh and take the dare
I've been running around with scissors in hand
I've been careless with a teenage brand
I've backed down from taking my last stand
And I come here today to rid myself of the promised land
Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1096332799269203442004-09-27T17:47:00.000-07:002004-09-28T16:28:10.230-07:00You made me see the best in life
You pushed me out and made me fall straight into reality
I backed into your arms with wide eyes and murmured hushes
You simply wrapped your arms around me and whispered it was going to be okay
I was
I am
scared of living
But with you here I think I'll be okay
Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1096266196950466042004-09-26T23:22:00.000-07:002004-09-26T23:23:16.950-07:00i could live in a warm place
a place with no memory
where a blink and a year run smoothly
i could live in a place like that
where nightmares wash away
in the early morning
and dreams float higher
higher than rooftops and watchtowers
Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1096000818695045922004-09-23T21:38:00.000-07:002004-09-23T21:40:18.756-07:00i've found a life that fits my skin
and deep inside are my bretherin
a tale for yours a song for mine
a bond that deepens through old time
and as we age and our smiles wane
we shall sit back and laugh
as we learn we are to blame
a mistake a shame a simple lie
coming from the most unlikely alibi
in later years a laugh will provail
from this funny, unlikely, crazy tale
Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1095302208123788382004-09-15T19:27:00.000-07:002004-09-15T19:36:48.123-07:00The moment I saw you hurt
I thought back to all those memories
Rolling onto me like waves in the great sea
Hitting hard and without mercy
I lost myself
That day
Watch me go under
As children laugh
Women splash
Men hit the turf with powerful muscles
Watch me look up as I hit the bottom
See my eyes
You then will know what regret really looks like
Let me be lost
And let those memories hit me strong Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1095028048206013662004-09-12T15:12:00.000-07:002004-09-12T15:27:28.206-07:00You were my light
My strength
And my constant memory
Of a time when I was happy
tucked away, but never really forgotten
I remember so vividly a time
You hugged me
Powerful and angelic
Looked me in the eyes
rare for a child so young
And said you'd miss me
Said you'd cared
Said I was something to you
Something
That word from your lips
Is a picture permanently etched in my head
You held my hand
Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1095026844691337252004-09-12T14:58:00.000-07:002004-09-12T15:07:24.693-07:00I'm alright I guess
I'm doing just fine in this world
Black and blue
Are just colors to me
Cold and hot
Are just your feelings for me
Dark and light
Are what I see when I step onto the street
You can leave me here
I'll be alright
You can walk away in time to the music
Hair flying
Eyes flashing
I'll be alright
I'll be content
Just to sit in my room, looking out at the world
Hot and cold
Like your Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1094858569759226102004-09-10T16:19:00.000-07:002004-09-10T16:22:49.760-07:00I've got friends because I can
I've got jocks and punks and outcasts that I relate to
Because I can
I laugh with the rebels the druggies and the preps
Because I like to
I'm not afraid of them, I can look them in the eye
Because I say what I think
Don't hold back, don't get discouraged and don't make it awkward
Don't forget and don't pretend and never
ever
Feel you don't have friends
Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1094858293398973732004-09-10T16:06:00.000-07:002004-09-10T16:18:13.400-07:00My weakness is lost somewhere on a beach you've never seen
Hidden in hot sand it listens to the waves lick the coast
It smells the palm trees sway and play together
It feels a deep sense of slowing time
My weakness plays with memories washed upon the shore
Laughing quietly, my weakness spends hours looking out on the horizon
And at the end of the day
A peacefull sense of closure heavies my eyes
Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1094614191906947622004-09-07T20:28:00.000-07:002004-09-07T20:29:51.906-07:00 remember me when I'm right outside your door
THink back to the time when you fell down on my floor
These memories may seem trivial and so naive
But there the ones we remember when we leave
So look past the now look past our nights
and all the pain
and all the fights
remember me for the laughs and tears
remember me throughout your years
Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1094368214691271172004-09-05T01:03:00.000-07:002004-09-05T00:10:14.690-07:00Pages turn and books close
Hearts left open, eyes still closed
Words said over
Repetition to the end
I'll only say sorry
To one who I call Friend.
Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1094366607754841722004-09-04T23:41:00.000-07:002004-09-04T23:43:27.753-07:00I could say I'm sorry
But I don't think it would stop the tears
I could beg
Again
But I don't think these wounds would heal
I could call and write and shake and yell
But
I think this is something I can't fix alone
Help me to pick up the pieces
Help me to put back the shreds
Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1094365702740813852004-09-04T23:18:00.000-07:002004-09-04T23:28:22.740-07:00A Poem for A Man
Mistakes
Played on shaky film shown in a dark theater
Myself
Front row, cringing as I watch the lights dim and curtain lift
Lead
I play, supporting actors and actresses fade in and out
All
Shown, I see what you saw, a film of deception and betrayel
Rewind
Start the film over, yet this time let's just make it up as we go
Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1093821729140414202004-08-29T16:01:00.000-07:002004-08-29T16:22:09.140-07:00Oh oh ohhhhh camp pictures how I missed thee...Went to Costco, picked up some camp pics, made me cry ( insert random teenage girl rant about how life isn't fair here ) and I will have them up shortly. On another note, I believe I have made a dirty dirty vendetta with the soon to be freshman wide reciever who gave me lip today...oh, it's on. On another note....as fall starts to peep into our doorsInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1093555318264787042004-08-26T14:17:00.000-07:002004-08-26T14:21:58.263-07:00Well well well...we meet again. It's been a busy world, full of chaos, wild poodles and ultra southern california heat. I have a golf game in about ten so this is going to be a quick post. Just wanted to say I will put more writings on when I get time (hopefully this weekend.) Sorry to anyone who thinks I've been avoiding them, I'm really not (well, unless you irk me) I'm just super busy. Kick Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1093323830509184262004-08-23T21:08:00.000-07:002004-08-23T22:36:59.350-07:00For those who have not been found:
Dark castles build impossible bridges
Mechanical animals turn into living art
Forgotten ballerinas weep for their lost loves
All at the touch of your hand
Winter melts its frozen grasp
Time turns a slow head towards progression
Rain caught mid flight stops and sighs
All at the murmur of your thoughts
Stories lost in ancient libraries call out
Runes of a Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1093320230071434802004-08-23T20:48:00.000-07:002004-08-23T21:03:50.070-07:00Well....what to write what to write. Hmmmm how bout I start with this: I'M HOME FOR GOOD! haha really people try to contain your enthusiasm...I have a lot of writings from camp which I will start to transfer tommorow onto my blog....but right now, I'm three hours ahead body time and totally exhausted and my luggage was lost and i have golf practice tommorow and school kickoff but who's counting? Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1091678881578634702004-08-04T21:07:00.000-07:002004-08-04T21:08:01.576-07:00You can grow up
Older in ways and years
Flare up with glowing eyes
Let it all bother you and catch yourself in between
But through it all
In the end
You are all you have
Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1091668593249313092004-08-04T18:06:00.000-07:002004-08-04T18:16:33.250-07:00Maybe as a child I was hurt
Left amongst a crowded room of angry souls
Torn and tattered to lie in the corner
All the while smiling through plastic hopes
Maybe you posed as a caregiver
Threatening and screaming behind closed doors
That lay locked and shut to all your friends and critiques.
Maybe I deserved better
Maybe you deserved less
Maybe it was all a dream
Maybe it was a nightmare to real toInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1091666399378766882004-08-04T17:23:00.000-07:002004-08-04T17:39:59.376-07:00On another quick break from camp...I must say though, I have missed this blog more than a lot of people I know. This summer has definetly changed me more than any other one thing. I got a lot more tanner, muscular, and grew up more than I ever though was humanly possible. I guess being in charge of 30 2nd and 3rd grade girls and knowing that they depend on you to sustain life is a sobering fact. Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1090474960381639492004-07-21T21:15:00.000-07:002004-07-21T22:42:40.380-07:00I let you wash over me
Eyes closed as that cool clean breeze whispers in my ear
I let this memory of someone once forgotten
Reminisce with all I had locked away
They play a delicate, tangible tango
Unaware of the repercussions their echoed footsteps create
As much as this excites and exhilirates my body
My soul has retreated to a melancholy corner
Leave me broken
While I can still pick up the Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1090469685853950062004-07-21T21:05:00.000-07:002004-07-21T21:14:45.853-07:00I wish all dreams were made to come true
Rather than fabled myths left hidden in sand
While nightmares from hell roam free to reek havic
Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1090469086061791182004-07-21T20:55:00.000-07:002004-07-21T21:04:46.063-07:00If all this music could just stop playing
If the clinking of forks and the tipping of glasses could cease
If the mindless laughter and pointless chatter were to die
Maybe I could hear
If everyone would stop running and kicking up dirt
If all the bright lights and sequined dreams were cut off
If pretty faces and exotic places were to just disapear
Then maybe I could see
If all the problems were Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1090467789036534262004-07-21T20:36:00.000-07:002004-07-21T20:43:09.036-07:00I leave tommorow for another couple of weeks at camp...but before I do, I think I'll leave you with one more lasting impression of me:
I live strong
As my mother taught me to hold my chin up
Up above their words and feeble hits
As my grandmother held my head while I cried
I learned compassion and strength don't have to clash
I live for today
And instead of holding back and biting my lip
I take Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1089087845762609932004-07-05T21:06:00.000-07:002004-07-05T21:24:05.763-07:00My dreams, I'm afraid have grown worse.
For in these reveries I find my death so
eminent
so
graphic.
It is with a culpable fascination that I hide them
Each by Each
by the stark of midnight.
I take them out secretly
One by one
and revel in the juicy desire of pain
I so badly yearn to entreat upon
myself.
Do not pity me, Friend.
I would rather you merely observe and take part
in this delicious Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1089086727773479912004-07-05T21:01:00.000-07:002004-07-05T21:05:27.773-07:00My daily victories I quietly sacrifice to you
My love
You sweep them up and brush them under
And all the while I'm merely glad
You touched themInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1089085341384107892004-07-05T20:24:00.000-07:002004-07-05T20:42:21.386-07:00I wish I could write a song
To show you just how excited I am
So when you play those opening chords
And an opening melody sweeps over your body
Eyes closed, tremors plucked
You will see just how nervous I am
Composing this memoir
Of a time when I met you, but we never really talked
Passing ships that never thought about a chance
But now I see you again, and my hair tucks itself behind my ear
Shy Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1089082335064405422004-07-05T19:41:00.000-07:002004-07-05T19:52:15.090-07:00Well, I'm off for another session of camp- So i won't be updating for a while...Try not too miss me too much, eh mates? Just got back from dinner with Grandmere (my grandmother) which entailed her opening the door, looking me up and down, taking notice I'm sure of my lime green running shorts and messy ponytail, and leading me in, shaking her head and muttering in German...oh I don't need to Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1088991726431978462004-07-04T18:38:00.000-07:002004-07-04T18:42:31.080-07:00I told her from the very beggining
I said, Lass you're lookin for trouble with that boy
Hey eyes glowed like a crumbling fire
She grinned like a child on her day of birth
I know, she growled, and I love it
I merely shook my head
And watched as I ran off with that boy they call trouble
Why did I ever let myself fall
for someone so much like myself?
Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1088990982419795152004-07-04T18:24:00.000-07:002004-07-04T18:29:42.420-07:00I play a cruel, hard game
Do you care to take a gander?
I always win in this world
I cheat and steal and lie
Your mothers shake their heads
Your fathers frown and glare
I leave each town in a whirl of perfume and torment
I enter in a quiet foreboding shadow
I'm not perfect
which makes me excel
I intrique you, admit
Begrudgingly you watch my show each night
Hide in the back row so you can't be Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1088915954246595242004-07-03T21:34:00.000-07:002004-07-03T21:39:14.246-07:00I've done some bad things in life
Some black, sequined in the spotlight things
Things, things, things
Sound so innocent, look so clean
Turned out I'm really cold and dark and mean
My life has been one storm cloud purring into the next
Out of you and into him
Is how I played
Play, Play, Play
Feels like hushed secrets kept for tommorow
I like to undress your problems and kiss away the sorrow
I've Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1088906546789724362004-07-03T18:51:00.000-07:002004-07-03T19:02:26.790-07:00Back on a break from camp, sleeping, eating and doing laundry (and I wonder why I left camp...)Anyways, camp is awesome- last session I was in a unit called Snoqualmie which consisted of 19 little 2nd and 3rd grade girls (h e c t i c) lets just say we had at least one bed wetter a night, one major sickness, about a dozen homesick girls and and least 100 instances of lost socks, hats or water Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1088904755079591602004-07-03T18:26:00.000-07:002004-07-03T18:50:30.910-07:00I've always been a stationary icon
A memory of someone who used to dream
My laughs come seldom now
Quiet, tiny diamonds falling out of my pocket one by one
My smile is always hidden
Boxed up and put away with last year's Christmas decorations
I've always been the girl known as nothing more
A wisp of someone brave and bold
And now that wisp is floating away
I often sit on the park bench
I stare atInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1088897442629738612004-07-03T16:20:00.000-07:002004-07-03T16:30:42.630-07:00Never been a huge fan of these, but what the hell....
Firsts
First job:Answering phones
First screen name: um...something like superchica747?
First funeral: Does my dog count? other than that...my grandpa's
First pet: Lucy, the everlasting beagle who died on my birthday
First piercing: Ears, age 10 or so
First tattoo: age 17, chinese symbol for courage on my back
First credit card: yeah, Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1088895129866268182004-07-03T15:43:00.000-07:002004-07-03T15:52:09.866-07:00It's all about the velvet streets
Lined with smoke encrusted metal tables
Set so seductively with muted candles
Laying quietly, flickering on the tops
A simple scene filled with lust and thought
Here the beautiful pale poets and intellectuals
Lay in ancient chairs
Black berets curled amongst the steam of fresh cofee
Under street lights purring a flame too lazy to burn bright
Under the heavens Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1088894461652963472004-07-03T15:36:00.000-07:002004-07-03T15:41:01.653-07:00I've found that in my life
I'm waiting for it all to begin
I've discovered a path that's marked and dirty
And that's how I want it to be
You see, in my world I'm a little scarred and a little hurt
But it's these wounds that give me character
For now I'm merely waiting for love to find me
For now I'm excited to find you
Maybe then I can show you my scars
that go deeper than skin
And maybe
Someone Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087796326270749432004-06-20T17:24:00.000-07:002004-06-20T22:58:26.420-07:00This is to be the last post on my blog before I leave...I'll be gone for two months give or take some breaks so try not to die without me people ::insert hysterical laugh here:: and all i have to say today is: stare out at the stars
BREAK... this is jessie muahaha i dont know who all reads this but diane is awesome and her and greg and i are all eating really good brownies, harlem shaking (Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087716144435147072004-06-20T00:12:00.000-07:002004-06-20T00:22:24.436-07:00Promises are simply made to be
broken they are so often
times we see only what we
want from you I don't know
how to tell you just how
I feel love and lust and lost ideas
formed in my mind during smoky parties
played out over and over like a broken record
that sings lyrics that fit my heart
lain broken
from you
Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087715565696361652004-06-20T00:09:00.000-07:002004-06-20T00:12:45.696-07:00I believe A sunday is a lot like a picnic with the relatives. It's fun, for yes it is the weekend. However, you know that with a inner sense of dread that tommorow is monday so the fun is detracted. A lot like being on a fun picnic with relatively dull people...Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087679912088407562004-06-19T14:18:00.000-07:002004-06-19T14:18:32.086-07:00Because my dog is apparently afraid of the dark, my mom got her a night light....anyone else find this sorta...well...WEIRD?Posted by HelloInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087679006321329782004-06-19T13:58:00.000-07:002004-06-19T14:03:26.320-07:00Ok so since I obviously am addicted to the computer I might as well make this my daily rantings too. Sister left today and for those of you who don't know her (be thankful). Valedictorian, graduated Stanford in three years and now anal as hell. So my foil and my foe is related to me- ironic. Luckily she's 9 years older (big age difference because I was adopted) and is the homeowner of some overlyInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087672924513808542004-06-19T12:22:00.000-07:002004-06-19T12:22:04.513-07:00I swear I didn't eat the last pancake....please love me :(Posted by HelloInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087672857337114752004-06-19T12:20:00.001-07:002004-06-19T12:20:57.336-07:00They call her cooooooooowboy baaaaaaaaaaabyPosted by HelloInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087672802608866472004-06-19T12:20:00.000-07:002004-06-19T12:20:02.606-07:00EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE I heart Bradyn (that's my I heart bradyn face everyone)Posted by HelloInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087672583151517302004-06-19T12:07:00.000-07:002004-06-19T12:16:23.150-07:00I could run my head through these lies again and again
I could pretend you care and actually meant to wave
I could stare at photographs aged and frozen
And I could simply lose myself in the past we never had
I wish you would see I never meant to
I wish that things had happened now
I wish your smile was meant for me
But instead I'm here instead of there
I realize now I'm meant for more
I realize Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087607280618280032004-06-18T18:08:00.000-07:002004-06-18T18:08:00.616-07:00YAY CAMP HAT!!!!....if you share my enthusiasm you're :A) from camp B) a Cowboy or C) DerangedPosted by HelloInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087604558984765412004-06-18T17:21:00.000-07:002004-06-18T17:24:17.396-07:00I've found a site that most of you will really appreciate. This man is the manager of a strip club, and give a very realistic portrayal of his business. I hold a lot of respect for this man's writings, so give him a glance:http://www.TJsplace.blogspot.com
that's all from meInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087604030726326332004-06-18T17:07:00.000-07:002004-06-18T17:13:50.726-07:00I won't pretend to be something I'm not
I won't say I've got problems
When quiet woman sell their bodies just to feed their children
I refuse to believe that life is really amazing
When men will die gladly for their different gods
I am not going to be afraid
Of something that wants to change me
Because
I won't pretend to be something I'm notInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087598862488067552004-06-18T15:47:00.000-07:002004-06-18T15:47:42.486-07:00Just try to remember why we're all here. People come and go through walls and fortresses we all put up to protect ourselves. It's a little habit I'd like to call conforming, a little thing we all divulge once in a while. Shhhh, just for a moment look at the world from the view of someone real.Posted by HelloInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087580837109864242004-06-18T10:47:00.000-07:002004-06-18T10:47:17.110-07:00Oh, it's HIS butt.....well then, I guess it's okay....but no more butt shots OK kids?Posted by HelloInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087580674190808252004-06-18T10:44:00.000-07:002004-06-18T10:44:34.190-07:00Who's butt is that?! Ew.....Posted by HelloInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087580634055620342004-06-18T10:43:00.000-07:002004-06-18T10:43:54.056-07:00Grrrr.....hardcore to the max mi amorPosted by HelloInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087504605920295062004-06-17T13:36:00.001-07:002004-06-17T13:36:45.920-07:00....Now you see why I miss it so muchPosted by HelloInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087504565214181532004-06-17T13:36:00.000-07:002004-06-17T13:36:05.213-07:00My second home...Camp, where I will be for two months...try not to miss me too much kids :)Posted by HelloInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087504558522906102004-06-17T13:35:00.001-07:002004-06-17T13:35:58.523-07:00Last day of camp last year....picture of me thinking bitterly how I have to leave my home for another year...but now I'm going back!!Posted by HelloInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087504506184894552004-06-17T13:35:00.000-07:002004-06-17T13:35:06.183-07:00It's definetly a different look than at home huh kids...Posted by HelloInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087453621412188962004-06-16T23:15:00.000-07:002004-06-16T23:27:01.413-07:00In life
I feel like sometimes letting go
Like sitting on the edge of a bridge, looking out onto a river
Those men you see on TV who sit there sobbing
Hope already down in the raging water below
You see them shaking and feel a fleeting glimpse of compassion for them
But I
I relate to these men sometimes
In life
It's those cold autumn nights that leave you lost
Sitting in a window seat blowing hot Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087452386630240982004-06-16T22:35:00.000-07:002004-06-16T23:06:26.630-07:00Out upon the evening sky
Lay spread a tangible faith
Lept among the stars it purrs
A divine intuition too great to grasp
Here a mind lay in it's deepest recesses
Poured from the blackest midnight
Stolen from the pools of the deranged
A horrific speculation too horrible to convey
As fog lifts its veil, her eyes are shown
Look, they murmur, how her beauty does glow
Like the brillant sky, her Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087439514163782142004-06-16T19:31:00.000-07:002004-06-16T19:31:54.163-07:00Annika I warned you....Kids don't do this at home (or at least don't take pictures)Posted by HelloInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087436223941112812004-06-16T18:37:00.000-07:002004-06-16T18:37:03.940-07:00Dark....a lot like my sense of humorPosted by HelloInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087435662216928472004-06-16T18:27:00.000-07:002004-06-16T18:27:42.216-07:00So I've decided after that mad blast of pictures....that this blog will not only be Diane poem land but Diane picture land as well....deal with it :)Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087435530000176532004-06-16T18:25:00.000-07:002004-06-16T18:25:30.000-07:00Yes, the arrow is pointing the correct wayPosted by HelloInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087435330807967702004-06-16T18:22:00.000-07:002004-06-16T18:22:10.806-07:00Not saying WHO that is....but it's definetly a shirt worthy of owning wouldn't you say?Posted by HelloInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087434872728774522004-06-16T18:14:00.001-07:002004-06-16T18:14:32.726-07:00My Poet Critic Ladies and Gentlemen Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087434843917176022004-06-16T18:14:00.000-07:002004-06-16T18:14:03.916-07:00Friends are good for making you smile :) Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087434672330402792004-06-16T18:11:00.000-07:002004-06-16T18:11:12.330-07:00And this is the pup that makes it all okay... Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087434610301918632004-06-16T18:10:00.000-07:002004-06-16T18:10:10.300-07:00The poet...looking er....down Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087432801497489522004-06-16T17:33:00.000-07:002004-06-16T17:40:01.496-07:00I could
write a poem for you
A simple
proclamation that shows my intent
But how do you show,
show someone how deep they've gotten
just how far into your mind and soul they've probed
I want to thank
you
my friend and so much more for finding,
finding me hidden in the dark
and with those bright eyes and laugh that breaks the shadows off the walls
Remember for years past and gone
Don't forget Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087361480654225442004-06-15T21:50:00.000-07:002004-06-15T21:51:20.653-07:00I do make mistakes
the biggest mistake of my life
was letting you forget who we were
the problem i can't let myself get past
is how i can't get past my feelings and just let you go
so i sit here, snowflake boxers and white sports bra, hair in a bun and chopsticks in hand, staring at what i used to have
and hating myself for letting it go
apologies are hollow, pleading is not enough
so i am stuck Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087271936380028172004-06-14T20:58:00.000-07:002004-06-14T20:58:56.380-07:00A poem for Someone I lost...
if i were to fall
a simple drop that takes my breath away
who would catch me now?
if i find myself crying
and all strength i have is sapped
who would give me the faith i need?
i have no safety, no faith and no hope....
i have just myself
who will save me from this internal tragedy? Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087180951198214142004-06-13T19:37:00.000-07:002004-06-13T19:48:02.686-07:00Irony
A society aimed towards resolving the bad
Shoots and fires and ends up hitting the innocent pedestrian passing out choir flyers
Big tall men in expensive black suits stand tall and looming and rule us all
But hide behind stacks of papers and sturdy oak desks
Teenagers lash out against conformity
And stand together in huddled masses to protest for their individuality
Teachers are the Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087102426467771462004-06-12T21:27:00.000-07:002004-06-12T21:53:46.466-07:00A story to read before Dying
It's just a quiet thought written from the back of my mind
A silly proclamation of my feelings in life scrawled on a notebook in the back of the bus
I sit, knees propped up against the dirty plastic seat in front of me
Notepad in my lap, pen behind tapping impatiently between two tired fingers
Hair pushed back into a chipped hair clip, falls out of place as I fight a Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087100180136897242004-06-12T21:05:00.000-07:002004-06-12T21:16:20.136-07:00For all I've lost
As we turn off the radio that's already gone and thick with static
As I stick my arm out of the window and let the air play games with it
As we roll down the windows and let the hot air pour in
As you press down just a little more on the gas
As we don't look back and just see highway and each other
As the hot sun overhead tries in vain to get to us
As we realize that life is Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1087094791939718922004-06-12T19:39:00.000-07:002004-06-12T19:46:31.940-07:00I don't know if this is going to make sense
The world is faced with a growing aprehension
Scrawled out on church doors and cult floors
Are the writings of a society
Obsessed with an idealistic man
As a society from the dawn
We are taught rules and regulations and beliefs
From sturdy oak desks in private prep schools
Some throw this knowledge away
And travel the world in search of the truth
The Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1086554290584346162004-06-06T13:37:00.000-07:002004-06-06T13:38:10.586-07:00ALright, an abberation from my norm...I was just reading my old blog and found a highly amusing, freshman "bored" list I made that makes me laugh...hahah! see? im laughing! hahaha...oh again! haha oh man its funny, here it goes:
Fun things to when you're hella bored
1.) Dress up in cheesy eighties clothes and sing along to Blink's "First Date"
2.) Put doll clothes on your dog (specially good ifInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1086552863655610442004-06-06T13:08:00.000-07:002004-06-06T13:16:03.660-07:00To my mother I have always been a disapointment
To my father I am his little girl that grew up too fast
To my sister I am a sad shake of the head
And to her husband I am justification for marrying the above
To my friends I am a little too large to nail down to just one little board
To my grandmere I am a state of constant confusion that ceases to end
To my aunts and my uncles I am just an Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1086551871279767642004-06-06T12:50:00.000-07:002004-06-06T12:57:51.280-07:00And I can be a female holden
Full of forgotten dreams and double meanings
I can be that dress left in the dark
The one that doesn't fit
I can be a heroine brave and bold
With a future that's unsteady
I can be the love you never had
Or everything in between
And I know
That the longer I sit here the harder it gets to unwind
So I ask
For a question or answer that shows me why love is so blind
I Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1086302965032178082004-06-03T15:49:00.000-07:002004-06-03T15:49:25.033-07:00Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1086302947786809462004-06-03T15:44:00.000-07:002004-06-03T15:49:07.786-07:00Forgotten friends lay dormant in distant shadows
Laying hapless like earthed mermaids gasping for air
Deep amidst the hallowed gloom
Of their inescapable reverie
They lie reminiscent of the days once loved
Today is not day but in essence their night
For they are the forgotten, the lost and the misplaced
I left a comrade there
As he slipped out of pocket I was not aware
Fell as I ran towards the Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1086057912278892992004-05-31T19:11:00.000-07:002004-06-06T13:15:45.223-07:00Maybe if I listen to static long enough I'll finally hear something that makes sense
Maybe if I go against the grain I'll finally start to fit in
And maybe
just maybe
if I run fast enough you'll catch me
Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1085689889975931192004-05-27T13:17:00.000-07:002004-05-27T13:33:31.350-07:00Too long had he felt his mother earth tremble and shake
for too fortunate he had been to be sacrificed as one of he survivors
The Great War, they had whispered among hushed, awed voice hidden behind dry newspapers and lacy hankeerchiefs
Now, he, a boy lay amidst this great glory and did not find its glory to be so grand
Boys who had made him yell uncle in sunny pastures just mere months ago now Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1085026712727288252004-05-19T21:15:00.000-07:002004-05-19T21:18:32.726-07:00And I'm coming back
Back to when I was much stronger than you
I'm picking up slack
And running towards
Everything you though you could ignore
I've become much stronger
Through all the hits you've dealt
I've picked up that extra adrenaline
That you thought you bottled up and stored away
Now I see your illusions
Now I can see who you really are
And as I'm running past you and yours
I see only blursInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1085012416668479322004-05-19T17:19:00.000-07:002004-05-19T17:20:16.666-07:00hmmm a much needed re vamp of the blog always is refreshing, no?Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1085009776264519242004-05-19T16:28:00.000-07:002004-05-19T16:36:16.263-07:00I'm just a girl
Such a little, tiny girl
Sitting on a park bench
Wrapped up in dad's old Harvard Sweatshirt
Eyes dropping tears onto the cement slab
That I sit so quietly on
Passerbys hurry past
Eyes sliding from big department store to the next
Not even noticing me
Suddenly I'm in highschool
Sitting at a desk, one of thirty five in a tiny classroom
A teacher stands up front, eyes cold and hard
Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1085009014766213642004-05-19T16:15:00.000-07:002004-05-19T16:25:35.240-07:00I remember so distinctly being a scared, skinny twelve year old staring back at the dirty mirror in a Macy's dressing room. The glaring light beat down on my stringly hair and gawky limbs. I remember so clearly tugging at a pair of bell bottoms that were too big and not right and watching as a silent tear fell down my freckled cheek. You see, when you're little the world doesn't seem to care at Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1085008495030473232004-05-19T16:14:00.000-07:002004-05-19T16:14:55.030-07:00sitting here trying to figure out if you have a place for me
i know it's strange for me to be here
that i know you could have so much more
i realize now how lucky i am
i just want to be good for you
i just want to be good for you....Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1084999071839148972004-05-19T13:37:00.000-07:002004-05-19T13:37:51.840-07:00shhhhh
just for one night lets let the night slow down
just for one fateful evening let me place my hand in yours as we watch the summer sun set
quiet down and realize words arent needed as we walk together
as the world goes spinning by
come rest your head on my shoulder and we can watch the fireflys
wrap your arms around me and tell me you love me
just as the moon rises into it's final resting Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1084762954504695962004-05-16T19:33:00.000-07:002004-05-16T20:02:34.503-07:00Friends!
He said so gallantly
Hands sweeping up the air and turning it to gold
Welcome to my Oasis!
His teeth grinned and his eyes winked a cornflower blue
They shuffled their feet uncomfortably and looked around
Convicts, murderers and and rapists stood huddled in a group
Scarred, tattoed, dirty bodies stood awkwardly in formation
My brothers!
He called out in his starched, tailored suit
Do not Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1084760932340285702004-05-16T19:09:00.000-07:002004-05-16T19:28:52.340-07:00What it is to cry
what pains have we reached in our lives
To show this brushing of weakness
to the pillars of society
That seem so strong and brutal
They're made of stone and are never to be broken
What makes a weaker man weep upon his eminent death
when fate has already played a steady hand
Such a subtle way of expression
such a gentle thrill released through sorrow
Sorrow, oh what a fitting Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1084337278865411262004-05-11T21:47:00.000-07:002004-05-11T21:47:58.866-07:00i've got too much life
runnin in my veins
going to waste
won't you take some of this
take a little time out of that plastic life
cut me up and leave me broken
take a piece of me home and at least love some of me
i've got too much life
runnin in my viens
won't you take that blackened knife you call affection
and slice through my heart
black and cold as your weapon of choiceInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1083890148934359992004-05-06T17:35:00.000-07:002004-05-06T17:40:16.043-07:00Cant think of a title- something like "dr. seuss on depressants?"
something from deep inside my head
fills my heart with a resonating dread
whispered rumors form into whispered tales
they take shape and substance and float upon gales
softly they drop atop my shoulder
tiny but deadly, as they sit each a boulder
their songs lick my ears and prob in my morals
the yarns tell of stories, of old and Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1083282579502219862004-04-29T16:49:00.000-07:002004-04-29T16:53:56.810-07:00Your Results:
The top score on the list below represents the faith that Belief-O-Matic, in its less than infinite wisdom, thinks most closely matches your beliefs. However, even a score of 100% does not mean that your views are all shared by this faith, or vice versa.
Belief-O-Matic then lists another 26 faiths in order of how much they have in common with your professed beliefs. The higher a Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1083105586829603262004-04-27T15:39:00.000-07:002004-04-27T15:44:01.280-07:00This is What you Made Me Do
When you wake tommorow
When you come home and remember
I wasn't there
Nod your heads kids
I bet you won't think otherwise
CLick on the TV
And Gasp when you see my yearbook picture I never did like
On the Six o'Clock news
She'll tell you solemnly about the young highschool student
You saw me laughing
The one with the bright eyes and crazy ideas
She'll tell you, hands Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1083105417340315122004-04-27T15:36:00.000-07:002004-04-27T15:41:11.826-07:00I close my eyes after a long day
Lashes brush my cheek as I try to forget
Bright lights fire off behind closed doors
As my brain tries so in vain to turn off
A pale hand sweeps quietly over a memory
Scoops it into the shallow fingers
And pours the nightmare off the bed
There it lays pooled
Shimmering dark and menacing
As I lay curled and shaking
It tries so desperately to reach me
Its apparent Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1083104894871857132004-04-27T15:28:00.000-07:002004-04-27T15:32:29.466-07:00I'm not from here
A little abberation that was not meant to be found
Differences in little terms
I came here for a crime to be repayed
Your planet
Is my home's hell
Feel guilty?
No?
Good
We're all here to pay for our sins
And to relive what we have done
I'm here biding my time
Sitting back in the shadows watching the turmoil
Waiting until they let me go back home
Waiting until I've served my timeInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1082676519136432762004-04-22T16:28:00.000-07:002004-04-22T16:32:47.013-07:001) Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, find line 4. Write down what it says: "how's the weather?" His uncle asked, lifting the stone. His hands
2) Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. Lotion!....wait wow...
3) What is the last thing you watched on TV? The Best Week EVER! VH1
4) WITHOUT LOOKING, guess what the time is. 4:09
5) Now look at the clock, what is the actual time? 4:10Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1082673456701905192004-04-22T15:37:00.000-07:002004-04-22T15:41:44.326-07:00And this
This is the story of my life
I sit here, hair tucked securely behind my ears, biting my top lip as I try to tell you what has happened
Our existence, my life and yours and the man in the corner in the back of the bus
They all matter and are discovered at one time or another by each other
My life is just a facet of yours
A simple thread of knowledge and date you can store and remember, orInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1082588624793146472004-04-21T16:03:00.000-07:002004-04-21T16:07:51.513-07:00Trying to breathe but finding it hard
What's the point of crying out for help
If no one cares enough to hear your call
I'm slipping into point blank death
A quiet time, a place for restInestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093424.post-1082418657655105762004-04-19T16:50:00.000-07:002004-04-19T16:55:01.810-07:00 i have wounds
that never heal
i have scars
that go deeper than you can see
i've endured hurt and i've endured him
i'm stronger than you know
strong enough to let you see my scars
strong enough to tell you who i am
Inestimablehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08154421452687243490noreply@blogger.com0